Monday, April 14, 2008

Hawaiian Dreams...

Well, we leave tomorrow for a vacation to Maui. I have to share that I really deliberated over taking this trip. I contemplated if I should I save more of my vacation days for when Dominic comes home. I questioned if we should use this time for yet another visit to see our son.

Dan was all for this vacation from the start, but I have been a reluctant participant. The only reason I finally agreed is because I have to admit I need a break from everything... work, the wait for our children, our real estate ventures, etc. I need to refocus on healthy living and appreciating what I have instead of taking my life for granted. I have really sunk into a dark place and I need to just relax and really commit to being present in my life.

I also feel a sparkle of excitement when I think about the matching Hawaiian outfits I am going to buy for me and Dominic. :) Pretty pitiful when all I can think about is shopping when I am going to Hawaii! LOL! Aloha!

Thursday, April 10, 2008

Terrible Experience Today

I had a TERRIBLE experience today! My agency sent me an e-mail with no words on the subject line, just a ";)"(winky smiley face) and no message, just an attachment. Well, I opened the attachment and it was a scanned image from PGN with Dominic's birth name, my name and a box next to "Adopcion" checked. I started screaming and crying and was SO EXCITED because we were out of PGN! I tried to call to confirm but our agency didn't answer so I left a message. Dan was away so I called my parents and we were all crying with joy! I don't know what made my Mom ask but she said "Are you sure?". So, while I was on the phone I sent our agency a quick e-mail to confirm and they immediately responded and said "No, you are not of PGN. This is just receipt that you are in PGN". UUUUGGGGHHHHHH!!!! I started bawling all over again but with tears of frustration and disappointment. It was just so horrific! I really believed we were out of PGN and I started mentally making a list of what we needed to do... I just can't shake the sadness I have been feeling for months. It's awful.